Tuesday, 2 December 2008

I miss secondary school!!!

Teaching in a secondary school, i can't help but get nostalgic about my secondary school days.I got to school early on monday-suprisingly....Just as the students were lining up for assembly.Lol i miss assembly, who would have thought..i remember when i used to scale assembly....id be in class pretending to be sick,scared shitless that a senior or a teacher would catch me and ill be flogged...so i always had an excuse/lie prepared...but i was usually never caught.

Whenever i did attend assembly...i was so terrified about leading that i had this face i always reserved,sorta like a dying chicken...so if by chance some evil senior wanted to disgrace me by telling me to lead..i do my dying chicken face,hold my tummy,and act like i was about to faint..lead assembly ke...i was bloody shy in secondary school and terrified of people, leading assembly can be likened to a death sentence...

In jss1 and jss2 i went to school with my brothers and two and their friends,imagine me with four guys in a car and the driver,we were perpetual late comers.no fault of mine though...while evryone was on assembly our car would pull into the school compound.we'd usually stay in the car till assembly is over..other times teachers would catch us and force us to go for assembly..and then we'd be punished for being lated...at times we were either made to do frog jumps around the school...

I remember all the school anthems and pledges...how we used to chop mouth in some parts...how all those walking had to pause immediately the national anthem was being sung...marching to our classrooms afterwords...

I remember getting flogged for not doing assignments,i had this citizenship teacher who was very evil..he never flogged on ur hands or ass...always on the back...we had this teacher we called 'Da rod' in Chrisland..i dont know if it was because of the huge size of his cane or the huge size of something else that was visible through his trousers...lol..every body dreaded being flogged by him....chei! whenever there were people to be flogged and the principal called on the services of Da Rod...fear would seize everybody!!!

There was also our yoruba teacher which we nicknames "box head"....You know all those over sabi teachers that can never let a thing go....always taking panadol for another persons headache,their oju aye/eye service knew no end...they found joy in kobalising students and took certain things too seriously...like how deep your brush was...i mean how does the depth of my brush affect the maths test i am going to have..brush or no brush i am still getting zero..i mean as long as i keep it neat..but no..box head must definately talk...he will be only to talk about the frills on ur socks..why you are using a hair ruffle with a colour other than the ones allowed..stupid trivial stuff..


In my teaching practice school they just had their interhouse sport heat, and it was actually fun...their interhousesports is just days away,i am actually exicted about it..

I miss practicing for interhouse sports...marching...all the excitement that surrounds the whole day...f course i missed two interhouseports...cause whenever i wnet home for midterm i always had typhoid..two bloody times...gosh i was so crushed..not even one..both times i had typhoid and then id hear stories see pictures...it used to hurt alot..the outfits the short skirts..missed it all..


The madam koin koin stories...Mr face cap..Dress-make-i-sleep..lol..i am so happy i never encountered any of them..the closest i ever came t experiencing those scary stories was when certain peorl came back from olumo rock with rocks and several people claied to have slept and saw something white telling them to return the stones or face their wrath..see pronouncements.....some people brought out their bible's n dusted off the cobwebs that had engulfed it and began to pray...

"I shall not die but live"
"No weapon fashioned against me shall prosper"

It was not funny oh, i think they returned the stones sef cause alot of students were complaining about seeing things..

The punishments...in primary school i had two ghanaian teachers, ghanaian teachers are known to be very wicked....u remember that riding okada punishment...Mr Christian would tell me to do it and put one ababio looking book on my lap and if the textbook falls...he'll decorate my back with cane marks...i once pumped tire so much...i couldnt walk down the stairs....but all these punishments wer part of school life me thinks...and i sorta miss it all...i know crazy huh..who would have thought.



When i was in Chrisland, i was a boarder and provisions were not allowed....i dont understand why...so back then we'd come up with creative ways to sneak provisions in..trust me..id empty the content of my persil packet in a nylon and empty my milo or milk in a nylon and stuff it inside the persil pack..i once put my milo in a nylon and hid it in my underwear bag..but the evil wench that was searching for 'contrabands' no gree o...she empotied the contents of my underwear bag for ground..yakata!! infront of the gate mean..out came my payints,shimy..i didnt have a bra then..mumcy no gree buy for me..even if my breasts were crying for support...i could have died...she just stared at me like..u think sey u smart...mos times i out smarted them...other times we used ourtr parents to sneak provisions for us on visiting day,till they made this stupid rule that u had to eat whatever u geton visiting day on that day./..and nothing gets carried into the dorm...i thought it was a joke oh..thats how mumcy and pupcy brought stuff from Mr. Biggs and some green apples for me this one time...na so i dey fill like james bond..genge genge..i look left, look right.start making my way to dormitory...only for someone to start shouting..stop there! stop there! i tuned around it was a secirity guard...what did i do..i started running to dorm! lol..u would think the jobless idiot would retreat..the man chase me oh...i didnt even know i could run like that...u go think sey i tiff something...the dude chased me inside the dorm and caught me..some peopele said i should have ran inside the toilet...i was like how now!!!..He said principal was calling me..chei my own don finish....i went to meet princi who was talking to some parents...she just told me not to take my stuff inside dorm and finish it outside and then i explained to her that it wa sjust a couple of apples..
.i am very sure if she wasnt with anyone.she for don slap me with tha nylon...i told her.yes ma..yes ma!!! when i ran into the dorm i quickly hid the biggs stuff in the common room so it was only the apples that were with me...so i explained to her that i only had apples...and she told me that in that case i could go...lol..u know want make me too go pose for room with the things my parents brought for me..make i dey look as everybody they chop make longthroat dey kill me...mba!

Socials!!! i wasnt one of those people who enjoyed socials..mainy cause i always had my back up against the wall..with no one to dance with...ayah..plus i was really shy so even if someone asked id have said no...so i was one of them peeps who stayed behind and borrowed peeps her clothes to wear for socials and wait to hear the uicy stories,who smooshed who, who danced with who...who slapped who for dancing with his girlfriend,who stole someone elses clothes from theclothes line to wear for socoa;s....the stories were always hilarious!! I did attend our end of year socials this one time..i had planned for it..when i went home i tod pupcy to give me money for clothes..and i went to a friends mum's store and bought a spaghetti and hipsters..lol..that was what in then..i felt real cool with myself..like dey don hear am...i couldnt wait to rock my new baffs for that socials...so the day came..wore my spaghetti and hipsters went with a couple of my friends..ended up not dancing..sitting with a bunch of other chics while evryone enjoyed themselves...the life of a nerd!...anyways there was dis one irritant...that no one could stand..he was like a cross between Napolean dynamite and Dumb and dumber....his name was Ernest...Ernest now started asking girl from girl whether they wanted to dance..and the replies were the same NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!...when he got to me,he was probably expecting me to say no...i said "my brain is paining me"...and everybody started laughing..like laide! only u wud give such an answer....

I was two different people i class and in dorm...quiet in class...crazy and agressive in dorm..they once nicknamed me 'Agresso"..LOL...this one time in ss1 i wrote this essay..My favorite food and my English teacher asked me to come outside and read it..as i made my way to the front, i started crying..the nasty boys in my class were laughing saying they bet my favorite food is Ponmo and Garri!!..lol...i was so timid..plus i was like 12 or 13 then..my English teacher started insulting me...i felt so stupid i swear...she asked if thats how i behave in dorm..but thank God no one opened my yansh.if not she'd have made me stand in front of class and read my essay...


I miss the fights...i miss london cell..not that i ever went there o! Okay london prison was a cell-like room they sent unruly kids for 2weeks...in Chrisland...and friends and classmates brought food and notes for them..lol...

I miss trekking to the kitchen to carry food and fighting along the way....

I miss watching channel o in the common room, i miss scaling prep and being caught.

EVIL MISS DIBIA.who would ask us to drink the imaginary blood ...for someone so prayerful she was the most evil person ever....only God knows what she was telling us to drink..maybe tryna initiate us...and whenever any of us tried to open our eyes we were greeted with a slap...our breats pulled..anything..

I miss after exams when we would play ten ten, tinko tinko,just run around...be crzy..watch movies in the hall for 50 bux..the first movie we ever watched on that huge screen was titanic i think i slept thru it, also saw Enemy of the state, and i know what you did last summer..oh and matrix...those days were the best.

I miss my morning duties.some of which included washing toilet...emptying the bowls they used to wash plates.sweeping and mopping half of the common room, cleaning box room

I miss passing through the place we tagged "the evil forest' and we would try to scare each other as we ran thru it...

fetching water from sick bay and doing rub and shine something...you rub and hopefully you shine!!!!

I miss recess in CTC, eating biscuits and tea..and then break when we ate proper food with our classmates and our second break where we were treated to juice and cake or something...

I miss mid day lunch in Chrisland...it was introduced in ss2..i think...the school decided to startgiving us drinks and gala or cake/biscuit(ok we were actually paying 10k for it) the first few times...we all got our mid-day snakcs..then slam slam slam and forget urself began...boys would take more than their fair share n u know gurls we cant rush,always forming so most of us wont get anything...after a while we got angry and soji-ed oh..we started slamming..lol..there was a slamming war in school..all classes started slamming.it got so bad..the teachers found out and slamming was prohibited..bt we continued after a while..

I miss sunday breakfast...Bread,sausage,butter,cornflakes and tea...miss that and hang urself..cause it was the best meal of the week!!!

I miss scaling school in Home science to go and play snooker, or go to the video club!!!

i miss saturday morning jogging...

i miss using my tooth brush hair brush..and scarfing my hair till it lemo-led..lol...pink oil and perm repair were a girls best friend

I miss chatting with OK(who i heard is now gay) like anyone's surprised about that news...
chatting in the biology lab in D-IVY, just gisting...and laughing...lol ...i miss him though he was fun!!
I remember when michael told him he was gay...that was before he came out...and then he asked michael if he f^&ked his father and proceeded to insult the life out of michael...you know how gay guys r..sharp mouths and can insult...lol...michael had been trying him and he just let it all out on the boy who couldnt say anything afterwards...i eventually met him in unilag,and there were still d same gay rumours surrounding him..even my brthers said "Liade this ur friend is gay" BUT I DINT CARE...after uni he travelled to yankee and that was when he came out of the closet!





I MISS SECONDARY SCHOOL!!!!!




I haven’t forgotten about getting the chairs for my students…I should put up an update next week....so all those who expressed their interest in it and want to help out..nows the time people..lets make this happen.

Oh and the blogger JOURNAL OF A LIL WOMAN..wants to thank yall for your comments..she hasnt been able to update or do her blog rounds cause her internet acess has expired but she would do so a.s.a.p.

32 comments:

simplegal said...

FIRST!!! Yay!

As a boarder too, I definitely know where you're coming from. I also had to do the whole marching to class bit at my school, they even made us sing while marching to class!

I dreaded leading assembly...I had no choice coz I was a prefect! At my school you were appointed a prefect and you were not given the option of refusing!

Despite everything I loved school though, and I kinda miss it!

Thanks for stopping by my blog; I'm doing great now. Enjoy your weekend!

Nefertiti said...

Ok, so I finished this Loooooooooooonnnnng post... someborri shout hallleeluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu....

LMAO @ Ponmo and Garri!!... omo, ur school was 'tush' o. una dey watch channel o. awon ajebutter ni yen. We were lucky to spy LTV from some teacher's stinky living room while fetching water. Gosh, I could go on forever. LOL @ ur social experience! Girl, You are Hella funny!

Abujamaiden said...

Kai this post is long...Socials, Ababio, Assembly, Marching,...wowza, i miss secondary school oh!

The Healer said...

hmmm.... i can see the reason for fidelis and chibuzor;your brain dey pain you...lol

miss secondary school as well...especially the parts when i swapped classmates books for stones;you shld have seen the looks on their faces...*sigh*

CaramelD said...

H-I-P for the hip, for the hipopo, P-O-P-O for the hip po po and T-A-M-U-S, for the hippopotamus, hippopotamus!

(Assembly marching song, nuff said!)

PS Don't even get me started on the saturday marching songs LOL

olu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
olu said...

I also boarded in sec school, so I feel you, though your experience is nothing compared to mine. I attended a hideous govt school, and I DON'T miss it. Well, I miss the fact that the grades in sec school are not cummulative. You know what I mean.

Buttercup said...

lol that was some experience!!! i still find it hard to believe that u were timid!

Rita said...

You really enjoyed secondary school... the memories are fresh on your finger tips...

Now I look back at all those things, I realise sec school was really fun and i wish i had made the most of it.

How is teaching practice going? Please give us gist about the interhouse sport especially the marching

wordsmith said...

Jay-sus that is one long post o

Afrobabe said...

lmao...I stareted writing about my bording school experience once but never finished it...you have motivated me...


one thing I def dont miss is morning duty!!!

Afrobabe said...

Still lmao at ponmo and garri...lolololol..hahahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...but i take style dey miss ponmo sha...can't believ I've not had it for over 2 years now...

~Sirius~ said...

Hey, How did I miss this???
As I was reading I couldn't help smiling and laughing.....I felt like I was a part of some of your story...Te He....

geisha.song. said...

this was a looong azzz post! but i read it all.
lol. i don't miss my secondary school experience one bit, and with all those punishments you listed? and no provisions?
i wouldnt miss it if i were you!!
lol

Just...Toluwa said...

a very long post!

I hated secondary school tho, until i got to ss3. i was sort of a push over and ppl made my life miserable. I guess i snapped in my final year! lol!

wellsbaba said...

IM BACK ON BLOGVILLE I DON UPDATE.ATLEAST UR MY "BEST FRIEND" comment on ma blog! 4 once!

doug said...

Lol! Quite nostalgic!!! Very nostalgic indeed!

Also a veeeeeeery long post like wordsmith said.lol

Thanks for stopping by!

pink-satin said...

i miss QC boarding house

princesa said...

LOL@ur Sec school reminiscing. It all sounded like fun except the drinking imaginary blood part. Which person blood una dey drink ke??
I love me some soft ponmo o but i dont know about the drinking it with garri part,lol!

Yep, am interested in the chairs thing for your school. Just let us know how we can help in ur update.

LG said...

lollll@my brain is paining me......only laide :P
i miss condes, rondo-rondo, fish-roll n asala :P

Jaguda said...

miss dem days too for real

Naija Bunny said...

Ehhh ya,
Im guessing your school might be ISL,
If it is, then im sure a good guesser. Let me know if it is, plsssssssssss

NoLimit said...

You made me smile so much this morning!
Those were the days...

Anonymous said...

@ pink satin

I miss QC boarding sch too!

aloted said...

men this post is long o..u for break am into part 1 and part 2...lol

didnt finish reading but i get the gist....i also miss sec school..

Zena said...

u..shy? in the same sentence?

didn't go to boarding school, had our own adventures too,but not like the boarders,

ur making me all nostalgic

Ms. Catwalq said...

i don't...

was miserable
made some mistakes

but i made great friends....

mizchif said...

"my brain is paining me" from this long ass read. LMAO!!! U will not likk me oh, but this post took me down memory lane sha.
See ur life with all dem toosh CTC, recess, drinking tea. Hmmm, top tea ko, coffe ni. U can like to ask those who went to federal schools abt sunday bfast.....ogi and akara, and that is if you come back early from mass, or u skip mass entirely, if not, notin 4 u!

The excitement of interhse sports, interact club dem dem, all those societies that were really just an excuse to travel and visit other schools.

Those were the days.

~Sirius~ said...

Knock Knock....you can't stay away too long.

The Boob Sistas said...

LOL. Babes, that my cousin i told you looks like you also taught in a secondary school in Nigeria before doing her masters in Economics here in England. You def have a twin...

If you can guess who this is, abeg shhhhh until i don old small for blogville. Please visit my new blog when you can.

Compliments of the season love.

LIL WOMAN said...

It hurts that i never had that bordaing school experience!i was always a day student at my mum'school which was boring!!! But gosh!,as always i love reading ur posts. secondary school was really fun for u. but u have got to be kidding! how cud u sleep through Titanic?!! i watched that movie more than five times and i just never got enuff of it. Your school na aje bu school, cos u guys ate susages and cornflates...when most peeps talk about boarding school, they talk about serious suffering, starvation and plenty beans.

as always tahnaks for mentioning my blog. u are the best!

Chi-Chi said...

Hey! first time here
am new to this blog, but u can imagine I always so it
and thought it belong to a boy
shit as in my mouth dropped when i saw a females pic. i was still in doubt thinking a guy used a girls name hehehe

well omg dis is post is so true like o save me WOW

seems all boarding schools had one thing or the other in common