Saturday, 2 October 2010

Social networking sites prayer meeting : twitter must die by fire

Facebook: Good evening my fellow social networking sites
Hi5,myspace,blogger,Friendster: good evening pastor
Fb: now we are gathered here for one reason and one reason alone…to call on our father in social network heaven to come to our aid against our enemy – twitter
Hi5: oh yes! Shamalalarakarakayibobobo(speaking in tongues)
Myspace: (gives hi5 the side eye) yes twitter our enemy
Blogger: do u know how many people, twitter has taken from me…nooo twitter must die by fire
Friendster: Father u must cast twitter into the deep
Hi5: sharaboboboboboyimayimayima
Facebook: let us sing this song before we start praying…hi5 give us a song
Facebook: (shouts) I say Hi5 give us a song
Hi5: ooh oh sorry…’I have seen, seen the downfall of twitter, glory be to God…glory be to Jesus I have seen seen the downfall of twitter glory be to God Amen
Friendster: when I look to my left, I see twitter has fallen
Myspace: when I look to my right I see twitter has fallen
Blogger: when I look at my front, I see twitter has fallen
Facebook: when I look at my back, I see twitter has fallen
ALL: we have seen seen the downfall of twitter glory be to God Amen.
Facebook: father in social networking heaven, you said when two or more social networking sites are gathered together..there you will be. father we come to you today to help us deal with our enemy..our enemy that is putting us out of house and home.father we have no other person to turn to, tohelp us fight our enemy twitter. Hi5 pray for us…pls no speaking in tongues
Hi5: huh, ok… our daddy in social networking heaven…daddy u said we should taaaalk that you are lizening….u said we shud tell u what our problem is..father we are talking and our problem is twitter..ever since twitter came into existence the rest of us have seen little or no interest from people in our sites anymore…father twitter is our enemy…he has come to steal our members, kill our sites and destroy us once and for all… father send your thunder,fire and lightening to scatter twitter once and for all…so that we can regain our past glory

Myspace: father we know you can hear us
father in social network heaven: yes I can my children
ALL: (shocked) did he just answer….father is that you
father in social network heaven : No its your mother …mscheeew jamb question
Facebook: father we are so glad to hear from you like this…this is a miracle indeed, father please come to our aid against twitter
father in social network heaven : but what has that lovable, sweet, goodlooking, hot, sexy twitter ever done to any of you
Facebook: father, I can see he has also won ur heart….but father… ever since twitter, we’ve been losing all our members…twitter is an enemy of progress
Father in social network heaven: Why blame twitter for being so awesome? Its not his fault…you guys should also up your game.Facebook you are becoming a bore..too many friggin apps and changes… blogger i wonder why you are here sef…..hi5 you…I don’t even know if there’s hope for u..whether u have been closing ur eyes all dese while..cant u see how facebook is? U don’t even want to improve and u expect twitter not to take ur members…ogbeni Friendster u can like to park well!
Facebook: but, but
father in social network heaven : but me no but mai friend! This kind of thing vexes me..u wont take out the time to sort urselves out and u run to me expecting me to do magic for u, what are you doin for urselves huh? Twitter doesn’t have two heads…
Hi5: father we think he is using jass
father in social network heaven : you see urself.. why is it that everybody dat is doin better than u must be using jazz..cant some people just be doing better because they are smarter, more innovative …huh?
Facebook: father, our daddy
father in social network heaven: hold on @afrocandy just tweeted at me…..
Facebook: father! So what should we do
father in social network heaven: U go back to the drawing board and come up with something to run twitter out of the social networking scene and stop yammering about and speaking your dirty tongues you this hi5..u think sey na beans to speak in tongues…yall are just lazy ‘social networking sites are not smiling’ now get up and go….and stop wasting precious time here.
ALL: yes daddy…thnk u for ur wise words….we see our folly.
(they all rise to leave)
Hi5: our father has spoken…chaporokajabajabakulutempo
Facebook: Hi5
Hi5: yes

(when they leave twitter comes out from where he’s been hiding and imitating the social networking god)
Twitter: buahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahaah what a bunch of fools…hahahahahaha gosh no wonder they’ll never get anywhere..they actually thought SNG was tlking to them..gosh I gata tweet that..hahahaha
Therealsocialnetworkinggod: twitter!
Twitter: (scared) who said that! Who is there…so you guys want to do your own
The realsocialnetworkinggod: shut up! Its me social networking god
Twitter: am…am sorry ..i didn’t mean to imitate u…I ..i am sorry..pls don’t punish me..pls
Therealsocialnetworkinggod: mscheeew whats my business with that… just wanted to know… how do u mute someone… @instantmessengergod is clogging up my timeline.


Kevin said...

LWKMD...Twitter is too gbaski jo...nice idea...and d part where SNG asked twitter how to

John said...

Another classic, though this is not as hilarious as the last one, how you used and dumped GLO its going to take a while to do something so good, kudos anyway>

Good job Lighdeh

jayeola papingo odunewu said...

buhahahaha..Awon enemies dey gang up...imagine HI5 self dey get af spoil finish

Ms Dang said...

Yay! 1st! Laide u r an ewu chei be u know? I've been laughing like a crazy person. They were looking at me funny in d car sef. I've told you...dash me your brain biko. At least for the times I need to write. Loved it. Mwah

Nono said...

LMFAO!! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!! This babe u r not well @ all. The end killed me!!! Hahahahahahahaha! Creativity toh baski. *now running to my blog* the poor thing has been crying n whining since. Fuck 8 to 6s mehn! Stoopid work.

Olalekt said...

I swear you dondeymadt

Olu-alabi Clare Temitope said...

Lmaoooooooooooo classic piece...

Mz.T said...

LOL!!!!! Ilove it! Gosh you're soo creative! That was hilarious!

Anonymous said...

I would like to exchange links with your site
Is this possible?

Anonymous said...

Shanda! (Hi5 made me do that)
Guess I'd shut my hole up now

Myne Whitman said...

You always make me laugh each time, lol...

Nutty J. said...


this is crazy funny

shorty said...

LMAO!!! Laide u won't kill me oo.

LusciousRon said...


Evee said...

Laide, you are crazily creative. Good job

LG said...

lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll yeye gurl, twitter tryin to get me too but i'm resisting small small sha'

Vanity said...

I am ROTFLMAO... oh Gosh

Anonymous said...

good points and the details are more specific than elsewhere, thanks.

- Thomas

jinxchyrs said...

loooooooooool this is so cool...legen...dary!! :)

the hedonistic nigerian said...

lmfao!true twitter's taken over oh!its not gonna get me tho.still with d resistance...

ekibihc said...

Wow!dis is a classic..ur crazzy

elspeth b said...

nau, this is just classic... Sum of us still try for fb sha.. Think imma steal this and use it as a note. No vex. D world has to hear of ur greatness. Cld u ff bak pls/ @ademisola

Anonymous said...

lmfgdao.,.,omo twitter is jus too mush mehnnnn