Thursday, 19 January 2012

My opinion about opinions

We all know what everyone says about opinions, about how everyone has them and basically they stink. Well not all opinions stink , only the ones that hinder you from “being great” by being great I mean doing you, living life.
I look at myself, my past how I used to be one of those people whose life was controlled by the opinions of others. How it was so hard to live life sometimes because of that nagging voice in the back of my mind “what would people say
or think”. That voice stopped me from doing a lot of things that I WANTED, because I was scared .I was scared of WORDS…when I think about it, It seems a little silly to me but believe me back then it was all that ruled my life.

You see, people will always talk no matter what…so why not just do what makes you happy? Why consider the opinion of someone who isn’t even a factor in your life, who when you sit down and think about doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Why why why do we let words from some other imperfect human being stop us from doing what we really want to do.
Now I am not saying oh I am totally immune to people’s opinions about me, I’d be lying if I did. I am saying though that it doesn’t rule my life like it used to before. The only opinions I really concern myself with right now are the ones from people that really matter. Not just some random classmate who I think would think of me any less or one colleague who will go around saying stuff about me.

I used to be so consumed with the way I looked when I was younger, oh people think I am FAT, people will think I don’t look good, people will think I am dumb, people will say why am I talking to this person or that person or why am I in a relationship with so so and so. I was terribly depressed back then and when I think about it that is a place I NEVER EVER want to find myself at.

Now I know there are slimmer, prettier, smarter, richer girls than me and I have accepted that. I have accepted that I am not perfect and I am cool with that. I have accepted that because someone doesn’t find me attractive isn’t a bad thing cause I don’t find other people attractive. There will be people who like you and want to be with and and there will be people who you just don’t appeal to. Doesn’t make them bad people its just the way it is. I have made peace with myself and although I still have my insecurities and every now and then they spring their ugly heads it doesn’t rule my life and it shouldn’t rule yours.
So allow people have their opinions about you, it shouldn’t make you angry (although sometimes it can) or stop you from doing whatever it is you want to do. The most profound moment of my life, that turned me from the depressed fat girl who hated the whole world into the happy fat girl who loves herself regardless and found the many other wonderful things about herself was what my dad told me one day.

My father just asked a simple question… “Why are you more concerned with what human beings, mortal beings that breathe the same air you do think about you than what God thinks about you” and I don’t know I just thought about that line a few times and my life changed. It wasn’t a fast speedy process but with time I changed.


Some opinions still get to me but most I brush off my shoulders.. I am very opinionated too but I try to have less opinions about people’s lives cause really I don’t know any better. My opinions are more about issues, entertainment, happenings and less about what this or that person should do. Who am I to say this or that is the right decision for anyone.

So there you have it….. people will have opinions about your relationships, about who you date, about what you do, what you wear….every single thing in your life. Try not to let it stop you from doing what you ultimately want to except it’s the opinion of someone you are sure has your best interest at hand cause in the end…. Like they say opinions…everybody has them and basically they stink.

13 comments:

bukiola said...

This is exactly wt I need now....tnx for dropping this....good job!

Anonymous said...

This speaks to me, I used to think I was unpretty and uncool and I was always crying cos I was talked about a lot. I still have a few issues, but iv learnt to abide by my own rules, if m too short or not pretty enough or tOo vulgar for someone, in d end, m gonna live with myself and not ur opinion(s). God bless U Laide.

ibeta said...

Finally tho. . .

Anonymous said...

this just made me feel better....i really shouldnt care coz it's my life to live....else i end up wallowing in regret & self-pity later...great write-up

Etoile Oye said...

And that is your opinion :P For real though, thanks for this reminder. Very necessary. Especially the part about it being okay for people not to like/agree with you. After all, you don't like or agree with everyone.

exschoolnerd said...

Thanks for reading guys :) GO OUT AND LIVE!!!

Geebee said...

Hmmmm, gbam! You hit the nail on the head and cracked the skull! True, while we should consider opinions of others, we should be prepared never to let any opinions stop us from expressing who we really are. I can so relate to this one.

People, THE GEEBEE CHRONICLES is back. Catch up on the latest episodes.

Toinlicious said...

This post reminds me of Bruno's "Just the way you are" song. Thanx for sharing.

Yinka said...

I'm thankful for the circumstances that steered me to your blog. at the end of the day, the eyes that truly matter aren't the ones that look at us only on the exterior, its the ones that take the time to see whats deep inside of us.

Busayo said...

I was once in very concerned about "What people might say". It ruled my life even to my choice of clothes till I realized that that wasnt the way to have an happy life. An happy life starts when you first feel good about yourself and then others around.

I embraced this philosophy and learnt to cherish myself, my ideas, my visions, my dreams and every other important thing to me.

Nowadays I even love and appreciate people's opinions (positive or negative) towards me because I believe that's also their opinions about themselves.

Beulah! said...

Totally on point!

O.U.I VILLA! said...

Ex-school nerd, this is really deep. Back in Sec. School i used to be socially awkward. Very. But thankfully all that has changed and that's because i changed my outlook on life. I feel like i know you already. I'm definitely following your blog. Pls stop by at mine when you can.

9ja-dejavu.blogspot.com

Northern Girl said...

Perfect! Something my Sis has been trying to get me to realise... it is not it to have regrets later in life, all because one is afraid of what others think (the 'others' who have their own issues ma sef). It is not easy sha but we all have one life to live and dunno when it will be over. Thank you for this post... I need it.